In the last session of our ADHD group program, we discussed how neurobiology and a naturally
dysregulated nervous system lead many ADHDers to have difficulty regulating their emotions. This week,
we expanded on this and explored the other ways that a dysregulated nervous system can impact those
with ADHD in the form of burnout, anxiety, and overwhelm.
We often go through our days without checking in on how much we have left to give. Many of us may
have obligations, deadlines to meet, or people counting on us to be on top of everything. The problem is
that when we push ourselves so hard, we end up stretching ourselves too thin. Our nervous system, which, as we know, functions as our alarm system and dopamine-regulation system, is given no time to recover. This week, we learned exactly what this looks like and what can be done to help or prevent it.
Defining ADHD Burnout, Anxiety, and OverwhelmWhile burnout, anxiety, and overwhelm are deeply intertwined, they represent different patterns in the
ADHD nervous system.
Anxiety: For many ADHDers, anxiety is a result of the constant effort it takes to appear neurotypical (also known as masking) and the performance gap between efforts and outcomes. In this state, our nervous system is in high alert, waiting for the other shoe to drop, anxiously expecting the next failure, mistake, or rejection.
Overwhelm: Overwhelm is often the result of the executive dysfunction common among ADHDers (see our Week Two recap for more details), such as difficulty prioritizing, planning, or organizing. In this state, our nervous system is overloaded, managing too much incoming data but knowing what to do with it. Every task can feel equally important, leading to ADHD paralysis and cognitive flooding.
Burnout: This is when our dopamine is depleted, leaving us physically and mentally exhausted. This is usually a result of prolonged effort, demand, or nervous system overactivation. In this state, our nervous system becomes overloaded, reducing our capacity for focus, task initiation, and regulation. Work tirelessly towards a goal or outcome without rest usually ends up being counterintuitive, leaving us anxious, overwhelmed, or, inevitably, burned out. It may sound ironic, but if we want our brains to speed up and work at the optimal level, we actually need to slow down our nervous system.
What’s HappeningAs always, understanding our neurobiology and what is actually happening in our bodies is key when it
comes to properly taking care of ourselves and managing our ADHD. Dopamine is a crucial component in
regulation, and it helps to think of it more simply, in terms of currency. Any effort that we exert, whether
it’s socializing, working on a project, or partaking in a hobby, has a cost and requires that we use a certain
amount of dopamine.
As ADHD is an interest-driven nervous system, we are rewarded when we spend our currency (effort and
dopamine) on something that is of interest, novel, or urgent. This reward is a return of dopamine, allowing us to better sustain ourselves and keep our dopamine reserves full. When we are burned out and our dopamine is depleted, this dopamine-effort system becomes unreliable. If something isn’t interesting or urgent, it can feel disproportionately hard to start. When we push ourselves and do not allow our nervous systems to recuperate, we often end up in the dopamine overdraft cycle, which has four stages.
The Cycle and How it Traps Us
- The Dopamine Surge (Hyperfocus): The cycle is triggered by interest or urgency; we are either
transfixed on a hobby or activity that we are greatly interested in, or feel bound to work by an
upcoming deadline or other external pressure. When we are in this hyper-focused state, we are
highly productive and feel in the zone. This stage of the cycle feels good, but it comes with a high
cost. We use spend more dopamine than we get back, and ultimately end up in overdraft, leading
to burnout. - The Crash (Depletion): Once our dopamine becomes depleted, we inevitably crash. We feel
exhausted, have low motivation, and our brain feels fried. Tasks begin to feel way harder because
of this depletion, and even simple tasks start to take more effort. At this stage, ADHD paralysis
comes into play. We may experience mental paralysis (brain fog or freeze from overstimulation),
choice paralysis (analysis paralysis from too many options), or task paralysis (feeling stuck and
unable to start a project despite wanting to do so). It’s important to remember that ADHD
paralysis is not procrastination. It is the lack of cognitive ability to initiate movement because the
brain feels ‘hijacked’ by overwhelm. - The Vicious Search ‘Quick Hits’ (Survival Mode): This is when our brain desperately tries to
find relief from the dopamine depletion and overstimulation. This search for relief might look like
doomscrolling, video games, binge-watching TV, shopping, snacking, or substance use. When
we’re in this stage, we often label ourselves as being lazy, but really, this is just our brains looking
for short-term, quick dopamine hits to survive. - Pressure: During Stage Three, we might see our tasks pile up, our mental load increase, and the
avoidance lead to additional stress. We’re maxed out and depleted, but we still have
responsibilities to attend to. Initiation of a task or project is often delayed until this internal
pressure is strong enough to overcome the low energy and avoidance. Once we realize that
something is at stake or there is a strict deadline we can’t miss, our nervous system provides us
with adrenaline to get us through it, which ultimately leads to the loop beginning again.
Spoon Theory
The spoon theory involves thinking of our daily energy as a set of physical ‘spoons’. For many
neurotypicals, the supply of spoons feels infinite, but for ADHDers, every single task, even the seemingly uncomplicated ones, can feel like it costs us spoons. Because ADHD brains work harder just to perform at baseline, we spend more spoons on mundane tasks than neurotypicals do. This can lead us to feel weak or lesser than neurotypicals, and we often try to hide our ADHD traits by masking. Unfortunately, this also costs spoons and can leave us feeling drained before the ‘work’ even begins. When we think of anxiety, overwhelm, and burnout in terms of spoons, anxiety is the stress of trying not to run out of spoons, overwhelm is when the current situation requires more spoons than you have left, and burnout is when we are in ‘spoon debt’.
What Helps: The Tools
Healing and coping begin with understanding our neurobiology, approaching it with compassion, and giving ourselves grace. Many of us feel that we should be operating on the levels of neurotypicals, an attitude that usually leads to low confidence and contributes to anxiety, overwhelm, and burnout. It’s important for ADHDers to stop trying to use a neurotypical ‘manual’ and instead focus on what works for the nervous system. Not being considerate and aware of how the ADHD brain is wired differently means that we end up pushing ourselves too hard to meet impossible standards without checking in with our nervous systems.
Effective change requires understanding our ADHD and working with our nervous system instead of overwhelming it. We don’t fix burnout by just ‘trying harder’ or criticizing our efforts, but instead by learning how to regulate our dopamine spend. So what does this look like?
Radical Acceptance: Prevention and recovery require radically accepting our neurobiology, both the struggles and the superpowers! Embracing our natural energy levels and letting go of the shame can reduce masking fatigue, and the effort that is spent pretending to be something we are not can go towards actions that better align with our values.
Mindful Transitions: This is a 30-60 second micropractice designed to help our brains shift from task to task without the common cognitive drag. We can do this in three steps: briefly summarizing what we just accomplished to give our brain a sense of closure, taking three deep breaths while visualizing the task you’re about to start, and setting a clear intention for how you want to approach that next activity.
Dopamenus: A personalized list of low-effort, rewarding activities that support motivation and help regulate your dopamine system. A dopamenu should be organized based on current energy, accessibility, and effort required. Low-capacity activities require minimal effort, provide high comfort, and involve things like listening to music, taking a warm bath, or watching a nostalgic movie. These are great for when we are in burnout or are depleted of dopamine. Moderate capacity activities require light engagement, provide gentle structure, and involve activities like taking a short walk, texting a friend, or finishing a small task you’ve been putting off. These are
great for when we have limited energy/dopamine. Higher capacity tasks require more effort, provide great reward, and involve activities like socializing, exercise, travel, and joining communities. These are great for when we have a lot of energy and high motivation.
About Alyssa Nohar
Alyssa is currently completing her master’s of Counselling Psychology with Yorkville University, on practicum with Impart Therapy. She works with teens and adults who are struggling to navigate the ups and downs of daily life. Please visit here to learn more about Alyssa Nohar. To learn more about our ADHD Group Program, please visit: ADHD Group Programs | Skill-Building Support and Psychoeducation