One day, I feel motivated, social, and ready to take on the world. The next, I wake up feeling drained, irritable, and overwhelmed by sadness for no clear reason. I second-guess everything—my job, my relationships, even my worth. Then, almost as if on cue, I suddenly feel like me again. My period starts, and I feel lighter, but the emotional aftermath lingers—apologizing, re-explaining myself, and bracing myself for the next cycle. Does this sound familiar? For anyone with PMDD (Premenstrual Dysphoric Disorder), this emotional rollercoaster is all too real. It’s exhausting, defeating, and often feels like you’re at the mercy of your emotions. But what if there was a way to manage the highs and lows more effectively? That’s where tools like ABC PLEASE come in.
This DBT skill is designed to help us manage both emotional and physical well-being, building resilience during tough times.
What is ABC PLEASE?
ABC PLEASE is a skill that focuses on emotional regulation by nurturing both your mental and physical health. It’s a powerful tool to help you proactively manage the emotional ups and downs that come with PMDD. Here’s what it stands for:
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Accumulate Positive Emotions
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Build Mastery
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Cope Ahead
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P.L.E.A.S.E: Focus on physical health to support emotional balance.
ABC Skills: Supporting Emotional Well-Being
Accumulate Positive Emotions
When PMDD hits, it’s easy to retreat from things that bring joy. Small moments of happiness—whether it’s listening to music, watching a comforting show, or having coffee with a friend—can provide relief and remind us that joy is still possible.
Build Mastery
PMDD often makes everything feel out of control. Accomplishing small tasks, like crossing something off your to-do list or enjoying a hobby, can restore a sense of control and boost confidence.
Cope Ahead
Since PMDD follows a predictable pattern, planning ahead can help ease the burden. Anticipate challenging days by identifying potential triggers, setting up support systems, and talking to loved ones about your needs. Schedule lighter tasks during your luteal phase and allow yourself grace on the more difficult days.
PLEASE Skills: Taking Care of Your Body
Addressing both emotional and physical health is key in managing PMDD. Here’s how to care for your body:
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Physical Illness: Rest is crucial when you’re unwell. Honor your body’s need for recovery to avoid burnout and worsening symptoms.
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Leave Substances: Cut back on alcohol and caffeine. Both can interfere with hormones, disrupt sleep, and worsen mood swings.
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Eating: Eat balanced meals to stabilize blood sugar, prevent crashes, and support hormone regulation.
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Avoid Mood-Draining Situations: Steer clear of environments or triggers, like negative self-talk, social media comparisons, and overstimulation, that drain your energy and worsen your mood. Mindfully distancing yourself from additional stressors is key.
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Sleep: Prioritize sleep hygiene for consistent, restful sleep to support emotional regulation and balance hormones.
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Exercise: Regular physical activity boosts endorphins and dopamine, improving mood, reducing stress, and stabilizing hormones. Even moderate exercise like walking or strength training can help manage PMDD.
Managing PMDD can feel overwhelming, but it’s important to remember that you don’t have to do it all. Tools like ABC PLEASE are here to support you in managing both the emotional and physical challenges, one step at a time. The goal isn’t perfection, but rather to have these tools ready when symptoms begin to surface (cycle tracking is key here!). By implementing them early, you can ease the intensity of your symptoms, build resilience, and regain some control during the PMDD wave. Be gentle with yourself as you navigate this journey, and remember—you’re not alone.
About Payton Newby, Author
Payton is a Registered Psychotherapist (Qualifying), currently completing her Masters of Counselling Psychology at Yorkville University. She specializes in ADHD, PMDD, anxiety, and depression, offering therapy for adults, families, couples, teens/young adults, and children (ages 6 and older). Click here to learn more about Payton.
